Between Life and Living
To live is to go beyond the basics, to seek out experiences that nourish not just the body but the soul.
"To eat is to live and not live to eat," my father would often say, a simple phrase that captures the essence of the difference between life and living. At first glance, it seems like an admonishment against indulgence, but on a deeper level, it serves as a metaphor for how we approach life itself.
Eating sustains life, it's a common knowledge, yet if one becomes obsessed with eating, it can lead to a life that revolves around consumption rather than fulfillment. This balance between sustenance and indulgence mirrors the broader distinction between merely existing and truly living.
Life can be understood as the mere existence, the biological processes that sustain an organism, while living is the experience, the active engagement with the world, the conscious choices, and the responses to external and internal stimuli. The difference is subtle yet profound, akin to the distinction between being and becoming, or between existence and essence.
Life is a state of being. It is the physiological condition that allows us to grow, reproduce, and maintain homeostasis. It's often explored in biological and medical sciences, where the focus is on the mechanics of living organisms—how cells function, how systems operate, and how life is sustained. But this understanding of life is devoid of the richness that comes with experience, with living. Life is the platform upon which living occurs, but it is not, by itself, a proof to the quality or meaning of that existence.
Living, on the other hand, is an active process. It is the expression of life, characterized by experiences, actions, emotions, and consciousness. It involves the choices we make, the paths we take, the relationships we build, and the purpose we pursue. It is the interplay between you and your environment, a continuous process of adaptation, growth, and transformation. While life is static, living is fluid—it is ever-changing, ever-evolving, shaped by the myriad forces that influence our thoughts, behaviors, and interactions. Our actions—whether self-initiated or externally imposed—play a critical role in shaping both life and living. Self-initiated actions are those we take consciously, driven by our desires, goals, and values.
These actions reflect our agency, our capacity to make choices and influence our own lives. When we act with intention, we are not merely existing; we are living with purpose. These actions allow us to carve out meaning, to create our own narratives, and to assert our identity in the world. Then we have external actions which often operate beyond our control. These are the actions of others, the influence of societal norms, the impact of unforeseen events, and the consequences of living in a world that is often unpredictable.
External actions can shape our lives in profound ways, sometimes enhancing our experience of living, and at other times, challenging it. The influence between self-initiated and external actions creates a dynamic tension that defines the human experience. It is in this space that we find the complexity of living—a complexity that is marked by the negotiation between our desires and the realities imposed upon us.
My father's phrase reminds me that life is more than just the actions that sustain it. To live is to go beyond the basics, to seek out experiences that nourish not just the body but the soul. It’s about recognizing that while we need to eat to live, there is much more to life than simply eating. It’s about finding joy, meaning, and fulfillment in the act of living, rather than becoming consumed by the mechanics of survival.
That's why life, when left to its biological function, can be a mere existence—a survival that lacks depth, meaning, or fulfillment. But when we engage in living, we transform that existence into something more. We transcend the basic functions of life and move toward self-actualization, where we not only live but thrive.
One might argue that life, without the element of living, is incomplete. It is an existence without essence, a shell without content. Living is what imbues life with color, texture, and meaning.
It is the pursuit of goals, the engagement with the world, the connections we form, and the love we give and receive that make life worth living. Without these elements, life may continue biologically, but it is impoverished psychologically and emotionally.
On the other hand, living without an appreciation for the life that underpins it can lead to burnout, existential angst, and a sense of disconnection. When we are too focused on the actions of living—on achieving, acquiring, and doing—we may lose sight of the basic miracle of life itself.
We may neglect the simple joys, the moments of stillness, and the appreciation for the fact that we are alive. The balance between life and living is delicate; it requires an awareness of both the biological foundation of our existence and the experiential richness that makes that existence meaningful.
Self-initiated actions, when aligned with our true values and desires, can lead to a life of authenticity and fulfillment. These actions allow us to live in accordance with our principles, to pursue our passions, and to create a life that reflects who we are. However, when our actions are out of alignment—when we act out of obligation, fear, or societal pressure—we may find ourselves living a life that feels inauthentic, disconnected, or unfulfilled. External actions, whether they come in the form of social expectations, life circumstances, or the behavior of others, challenge us to adapt, to find resilience, and to grow.
These actions can be both positive and negative. Positive external actions—such as support from people we love, opportunities for growth, and affirmations of our worth—can enhance our experience of living. They can provide us with the resources we need to thrive and the confidence to pursue our goals.
Negative external actions—such as trauma, loss, and rejection—can threaten our sense of self and our ability to live fully. But they also offer opportunities for growth, for developing resilience, and for finding new meaning in the face of adversity, depending on how we take it. In the process of living, we must also contend with the existential realities of life—namely, its impermanence and uncertainty. Life is finite, and living involves the awareness of that finitude. This awareness can be both a burden and a gift.
It is a burden in that it confronts us with the inevitability of death, the loss of loved ones, and the unpredictability of the future. But it is also a gift, as it reminds us to cherish the present moment, to live fully, and to make the most of the time we have.
With regard to any calamity or sickness, you may think that life could be even worse, because the decree of Allah, may He be exalted, is limitless, so if Allah wanted to multiply it and increase it, what is there that could stop or prevent Him? So make sure you give thanks that it was not worse than that in your existence.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said: In response to calamities, people fall into many ranks:
1. One who is grateful
2. One who shows acceptance and contentment
3. One who is patient
4. One who panics.
Panicking during calamity is doing something that is prohibited and that means you're expressing discontent with the decree of Allah, the Lord of the Worlds, in Whose hand is the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth, His is the dominion and He does whatever He wills.
If you're patient, you're doing that which is obligatory. Certainly, the one who is patient is the one who puts up with calamity. In other words, he finds it bitter and difficult and hard, and he dislikes it befalling him, but he puts up with it and restrains himself from saying or doing anything that is prohibited. This is what is obligatory.
As for the one who shows acceptance and contentment, he is the one who does not worry about this calamity, for he sees that it is from Allah, so he accepts it with complete acceptance and feels no sorrow or regret in his heart, because he is completely content. His situation is better than that of the one who is merely patient.
They are those referred to وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابرِینَ الَّذینَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُمْ مُصِیبَهٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَ إِنَّا إِلَیْهِ رَاجِعُونَ
As for the one who is grateful, he gives thanks to Allah for this calamity. But you may ask: how can one give thanks to Allah during calamity, when it is evident that this is a calamity?
The answer is in two folds:
Firstly, he looks at those who are afflicted with a greater calamity, and he gives thanks to Allah that he has not been afflicted with such a level of calamity.
Secondly, he realises that this calamity has befallen him as expiation for his bad deeds and to raise him in status, if he is patient, and what awaits him in the hereafter is better than what is in this world, so he gives thanks to Allah. Moreover, those who are most sorely tested among the people are Prophets, then the righteous, then the next best, then the next best. So he hopes that he is one of the righteous, and he gives thanks to Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, for this blessing.
Giving thanks for calamities is mustahabb, because it is superior to acceptance, for gratitude includes acceptance and more. Moving on, the actions we take, both self-initiated and external, can either bring us closer to a life of fulfillment or distance us from it.
When we live with intention, with a clear sense of purpose, and with an awareness of the impact of our actions, we are more likely to experience life as a rich, meaningful journey.
We are more likely to find joy in the simple moments, to cultivate deep connections with our Rabb, the Qur'an and others, and to contribute positively to the world around us.
When we are passive in our approach to living—when we allow external actions to dictate our lives without reflection or resistance—we may find ourselves merely existing rather than truly living. We may become disconnected from our own desires, from the people around us, and from the world itself. This disconnection can lead to feelings of emptiness, despair, and a lack of meaning.
Ultimately, the difference between life and living is a matter of engagement. Life is the given, the starting point, the foundation upon which we build. Living is what we do with that foundation, how we choose to engage with the world, and how we navigate the complex interplay between self-initiated and external actions. It is in this engagement that we find our humanity, our purpose, and our sense of fulfillment.
To live fully, we must embrace both the simplicity of life and the complexity of living. We must acknowledge the realities of our existence while also pursuing the experiential richness that makes that existence meaningful. Even the sad moments because they shape us.
We must take responsibility for our self-initiated actions, recognizing that they shape the course of our lives. At the same time, we must navigate the external actions that influence us, finding ways to maintain our sense of self and purpose even in the face of challenges.
Truly, to eat is to live, but to live is to go beyond eating. It is to find meaning in the simple acts of life and to elevate them to something greater. It is to recognize that while life may be a biological necessity, living is an art—a continuous process of creation, adaptation, and growth
Thank you, sir.